Thursday, February 28, 2013
Fits me perfect
Romans 7, especially the last part, fits me right now. I know what I am supposed to do but I'm letting my other side guide me right now.
Tuesday, February 26, 2013
Wednesday, February 13, 2013
Singles Devotional for me again
You might be seeing a lot of me on here. I'm off Facebook for Lent. :) Time to focus in the more important. Here's what I learned last night:
For I desire mercy and not sacrifice, and the knowledge of God more than burnt offerings. Hosea 6:6
Mercy? God desires mercy from us? What kind of mercy does God desire from us? Mercy towards others? Mercy towards myself? I'll admit, I'm okay in mercy towards certain types of people but not all types. I'm not at all good in mercy towards myself. I'm hanging onto guilt from things I did a long time ago. I use these as excuses to keep me from other things. And mercy towards others? I need to show God's love to everyone regardless of anything that they may have in their lives.
For I desire mercy and not sacrifice, and the knowledge of God more than burnt offerings. Hosea 6:6
Mercy? God desires mercy from us? What kind of mercy does God desire from us? Mercy towards others? Mercy towards myself? I'll admit, I'm okay in mercy towards certain types of people but not all types. I'm not at all good in mercy towards myself. I'm hanging onto guilt from things I did a long time ago. I use these as excuses to keep me from other things. And mercy towards others? I need to show God's love to everyone regardless of anything that they may have in their lives.
Tuesday, February 12, 2013
Another Valentine's Day devotional for my self...
I really hate Valentine's Day. Not so much for the holiday and what it stands for, but for the fact this will be my 35th Valentine's day as a single. It seems that as the holiday approaches, I see countless reminders that I will spend yet another Valentine's Day as a single. Life is not all chocolate and roses for me, darlings.
My life is not made up of thorns and empty candy boxes either. My life is actually quite full, when I really stop to think about the things I do have instead of the things that I don't have (which I have to admit is not very often). My sweet moods often turn sour when I focus on the wrong things. Such was an issue the other night. I was practicing a song to sing at church. The chorus of the song ends with:
However...
My life is not made up of thorns and empty candy boxes either. My life is actually quite full, when I really stop to think about the things I do have instead of the things that I don't have (which I have to admit is not very often). My sweet moods often turn sour when I focus on the wrong things. Such was an issue the other night. I was practicing a song to sing at church. The chorus of the song ends with:
I confess You're always enough for me, You're all I need
(What Love is This performed by Kari Jobe)
My mood went south very quickly. Why? My mind went to all the things that I didn't have, thinking of all the reasons why I don't let God be enough. I let my mind run with those thoughts for a little while, and I couldn't listen to the song any longer. Suddenly, Elkanah's words to Hannah popped into my head. She was mourning her lack of children, and he says to her, "Am I not better to you than ten sons?" (my words, Scripture found in 1st Samuel) Hannah was mourning what she didn't have, because the listened to the verbal jabs from her "rival."
In a way, Satan can be a "rival" in my life. Instead of listening to my Father, I listen to his taunts. "You'll never be married, Diana. You'll never be a mother. No guy will ever be interested in you. You are a failure because you did this." And on it goes, like a broken record that does not thought. Actually, all he has to do is play a 10 second intro and I pick up the rest of the song myself. I've gotten to know all the verses very well. In fact, many times I have it on repeat all day long.
Hannah did one thing that I haven't done very well. She took her mourning before the Lord. I have not. I tell myself (using the lies from the enemy as substantiation) that God will not answer that prayer, and why ask Him for something that He doesn't intend to give me in the first place? But do I know the mind of God? Who am I that I should question Him? Are His plans or His thoughts my own? No. I need to learn from Hannah and take my mourning before the Lord and let Him turn it into joy in His own way. Will He give me what I ask for? Probably not, but maybe if I am willing to ask Him, He will give me a new song to sing. A song full of truth, and not full of lies.
In a way, Satan can be a "rival" in my life. Instead of listening to my Father, I listen to his taunts. "You'll never be married, Diana. You'll never be a mother. No guy will ever be interested in you. You are a failure because you did this." And on it goes, like a broken record that does not thought. Actually, all he has to do is play a 10 second intro and I pick up the rest of the song myself. I've gotten to know all the verses very well. In fact, many times I have it on repeat all day long.
Monday, February 4, 2013
Valentines Day Devotional for myself
The Weight of Waiting
Therefore, since we also have such a large cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us lay aside every weight and the sin that so easily ensnares us. Let us run with endurance the race that lies before us, keeping our eyes on Jesus, the source and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that lay before Him endured a cross and despised the shame and has sat down at the right hand of God’s throne. Heb. 12:1-2
In my life, singleness can be a pretty hefty weight to carry around. The heaviness doesn’t come from singleness itself, but the desire for things that are not there (spouse, children, etc). Heaviness can also come through expectations from our society (what’s wrong with me, I’m too old, etc) and the intentions of well-meaning people who want to match you up with every single person that comes into their range of vision. Sometimes this weight gets to be a bit much to bear.
However, I also have to look at the weight that I don’t have to carry because I’m single. The weight of spousal expectations, the weight of worry that comes with having children, the weight of sharing one’s life with someone else. Marriage and singleness are on a scale, and people will differ on which side is the heaviest.
It may sometimes seem that you or I are the only one on this path. It feels like we are alone in the universe and everyone else is paired up with another person. But that’s the beauty of Christianity. We are not the only ones that have travelled this path. We are not traveling this path alone. We have examples of people who have walked the same path and people around us to help us. Sometimes we may have to look a little closer at the people around us, or maybe look in places where we have not looked before.
Therefore, since we also have such a large cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us lay aside every weight and the sin that so easily ensnares us. Let us run with endurance the race that lies before us, keeping our eyes on Jesus, the source and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that lay before Him endured a cross and despised the shame and has sat down at the right hand of God’s throne. Heb. 12:1-2
In my life, singleness can be a pretty hefty weight to carry around. The heaviness doesn’t come from singleness itself, but the desire for things that are not there (spouse, children, etc). Heaviness can also come through expectations from our society (what’s wrong with me, I’m too old, etc) and the intentions of well-meaning people who want to match you up with every single person that comes into their range of vision. Sometimes this weight gets to be a bit much to bear.
However, I also have to look at the weight that I don’t have to carry because I’m single. The weight of spousal expectations, the weight of worry that comes with having children, the weight of sharing one’s life with someone else. Marriage and singleness are on a scale, and people will differ on which side is the heaviest.
It may sometimes seem that you or I are the only one on this path. It feels like we are alone in the universe and everyone else is paired up with another person. But that’s the beauty of Christianity. We are not the only ones that have travelled this path. We are not traveling this path alone. We have examples of people who have walked the same path and people around us to help us. Sometimes we may have to look a little closer at the people around us, or maybe look in places where we have not looked before.
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